looser

hey...friends...

u know,today my IAF-ekt result got declred nd guess wat...i did not make it up to that level:)

i feel like suiciding on this  news cuz nothing's going well....my whole life nd career is screwd up....

these days i wear a fae mile everywher i go....cuz i dnt want people to b kidding about my life....

u now...my 2 batchmates sittin behind nd forth got selected!!but i was a looser to b left...that is incredible..

i just dont have ny hope left for my career left....i m thinkin f may b i am at a wrong place at wrong time...

fucked up life,sucking scedule nd my parents who have great hope frm me...:(

kaashhh......main bhi kuch talented hota to kuch na kuch kar hi leta life main but as i know my fucked up destiny dont let me..
if nyne reading this.....u know i'm a fucking looser on dis planet:)

ME

*listening to drake nd josh's- i found a way*

helloo.....planet people.....:D

u know guys ,I just post here whenevr i am little sore or want to share my mind nd relax by yelling in the blog..:P

but..today i'm in a chilled mood....listening to cool music,no girls as usual...,but moreover its cuz my CAT xam is over nd semesters r comin..so its just resting time for me...as aftr couple f days i hav to start ovr my b.tech sem. studies....havn't studied a single peny....!!:(

also cuz f prep. f CAT i discontinued my workout:((..that's the stuff i miss,cuz that my prior habit or say hobby..:)



about my stolen phone..well its in delhi but i can't make my mind to travel to delhi as its too time taking nd more over...this month i travelled too much..:\

nd yea...HAPPY WINTER SEASON to awl.....its nice feeling cold nd u know feel like sleeping awl day :)

nd moreover now my system is going through bad days....don't know wats creating problem...:\

 these days ...in evening i mainly go out for walk u know..like  for as in just change f mood..:)

so..that's it...that's aw i'hav been doing these days....

c u guys later...adios:)

My Mobile

sorry..for being so absent here....

but..itz just the stuffs that r being going on in my life
u know....my mobile has been stolen by a uy that ws sleeping besides me in IIT.GUWAHATI techfest

as the TRACKER was onso i got the sim. no. that he used while testing....so i called him....nd just threatened him to let back my mobile

so...after long thinkin..he finally is ready to give my mobile....just for sake that i won't complaint to cops about him....

it feels like i'm just 50% without my cell

SOMEBODY'S ME..:(

wat else..i got a crush on this girl named RIYA KAPOOR...

but as always their r so behemoth boys behind her..that i even can't talk to her.....as i feel like i'm just a crowd to her...nd that's also right cuz ..there's no relationship btween us..just hi/hello on orkut

besides awl is well.......just thinkin f my mobile..how to get back frm ORISSA...

i'll notifiy here...f wats the next happening...till then adios..:)

CINDRELLA MAN

OK...so here i am again.......searching for my GOOD LIFE


though the search remains rambling nd much f a less ostracized then othr entrants but ........i feel its made like that....*dims*

so......u know


i wish sum times that


can we just pretend that airplanes in night sky r like stars ,so that i can really use my wish right now......???


i life just gets more nd more easy...so complications...as i don't know wat the issues r mainly


right now i'm in my college's E-library....watching like a thief..to the receptionist siting behind me.......talkin to her bf

damn....she's sexy man......nd 1 f my cohort suggesting me to just watch her constantly..............


hehe......chalo bye

:D

bas aise hi

aaj ...ka din ekdum rotten out tha...

pata nai..kya ho ra hai life main

har din bas nikal jaata hoon ghar se ye soch k ki..aaj kuch to aisa hoga jo future main meri help karega ya jo mera future hoga..but...its awl the same lame life...

i just had fight with a auto driver.....har roz apne crush ko kisi aur k saath jaate dekhna...

don't know where my future is going in study space...

i feel like..i don't belong in here.....in this lame nd witty world....

god..i'm too sore today...

nd this goddam heart don't even realize itz over....

bye....my mood is too off today

yaaden....:)

koi purani yaad mera raasta rok kar mujhse kehti hai.. itni jalti dhoop me tum kab tak ghoomogey.. aao chalke beetey dino ki chhao me baithey.. us lamhe ki baat kare jisme koi phool khila tha.. us lamhe ki baat kare jisme kisi aawaz me dil dharakta tha.. us lamhe ki baat kare jisme kisi nazro ke moti barsey thhe.. koi ...purani yaad mera raasta rok kar kehti hai.. itni jalti dhoop me tum kab tak ghoomogey..

sum good ones..

hey guys...
now...m postin sum lines here...which i think...r quiet awesomely written


Hamare baad nahi aaey ga tumhain chahat ka aisa maza
tum logon se kehtay phiro gay mujhay chaho us ki tarha...


another one...

True love means...




Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot...




...who calls you back when you hang up on him...




...who will stay awake just to watch you sleep...




...wait for the guy who kisses your forehead...




...who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats...




...who holds your hand in front of his friends...




...wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he
cares about you and how lucky he is to have you...




...wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her,
or that's him"...

believe me someone..i didn't tend to kill the puppy:(:(:-{

this happened few min. before...when i was driving car...

a small puppy came in between the road,i don't know why....!!:(

nd i coudn't do much..rather jumping my car on him....SORRY ..:(

i was in such a condition that....if i had saved him..my car would have thrashed on pavement area:(

i saw..another dog...watchin him ,by coming nd sittin beside him...as if..he was reciting a god prayer for him...:(

nd now...i feel ..like killing myself........i hate myself. man....


this ain't a joke.........but every one's now angry on me

par mane hi galti ki hai..to main hi use sahi karoonga......

from tomarrow..i will atleast feed 2 dogs......other then..my 3 who r in our colony....

SORRYY SORRY SORRY..:(


MEHAK......NEED U'R BIG SUPPORT YAAR....:(

p.s....i love u...:(

fired off ,from life

so..today was a pretty alone day

all my close friends r busy visitin their relatives.....

so no one..to  company me...

nd as u all know.....my proposal also got fired up

nd my lamest destiny is also working hard,to break the record.....for gettin more lame on me

saala mera saath hi hamesha aisa kyun hota hai

jab doosron ko jaroorat hoti hai,tab main kaise bhi karke unhe depressed condition se thoda bahar le ata hoon

par jab main aisi condition main hota hoon,to ek banda/bandi bhi nai poochta........

so...as i thought in my moment f new yr...

this year is also going to b a fake valentine for me

not a single hope...seems to b comin....from my love......

aisi ladki se pyaar ho gaya, jo .....meri feelings ko itne jokingly leti hai..ki i just som times feel like ,beating my heart in a brutal manner...:(

sai hai yaar waise.......solitudal life hi best hoti hai....

bas...apne se pyaar karo,kisi ko bhaav na do,duniya jaye bhaaad main....roz vicks laga k so jao...

so...now ...as maine apni life ka love to ek hi noob pe luta diya

so...its time to concentrate other things in life....

ab agar.kabhi samjhegi mere love ko,to shayad mera 3 main e 1 dream poora ho jaye

nai..to baaki 2 dreams hi poora karne ki koshish karoonga....:)

aaj health ,thodi kharab hai.........headache hai,eyes red hain,throat choaked hai,both hands main chot hai...

baki sab to mast chal raha hai life main,as always......

aaj ek bhi text nai aya uska....so us wajah sse thoda aur health kharab hai.....

she's a pretty sweet nd nice girls yaar.....

kaash...wo bhi thoda sa ,soft corner rakhti mere pe....:-/

chalo...this is dedicated to her


You may be
Just a lil bit deewani
Thodi thodi si crazy 
 But baby you’re the one...:)<3

Tum jaisi  Hai na koi yun deewani (deewani)
Thodi thodi si crazy
But baby you’re the one....


feels nice...to just spend some words for her



kaash ,main use valentine's day k din call karta


nd use fir se propose karta....nd wo haan bol deti...kaash......huuhhhh


darn't me......dreamin all the times.....


mere ankhon k toote hue sapne....u know.....:(


par its ok.......she deserves a much more love then me...i guess.....

i'm just a guy who even don't know,ki morning main ,mera brush pata ni kahan hota hai....:(


she deserves a rich ......beloved nd hearty guy....not a noob like me...who even don't know....how to select good vegetables...


i'm duhhh.........i just want smile on her face......AS I PROMISED HER DAD...


bas,aur sochta hoon ki,fir se books main ghus jaoon......jaisa padaku school main tha,waisa ban jaoon


just...want to dream again....plz....


bye all.....

hey....P.S. I LOVE U


ICHE LIEBE DICH

Reckless

u know guys....

u go around strange,when u fall in love strangely with a person....who even can't b yours, in dream...

u seem to just .....feel around every day...each moment ....every morning..

what if she ,loved me .....the way i do......

i just dream about it, in evry nap that i have got....:)

but....as the eyes open.....reality seems to just brake nd shutter my dreams...like a wave in water....

its...just ...i don know...i can't explain this love feeling.......

u know...
my behaviour has changed so much....after this happened to me

from a boy ,who was so cold hearted towards girls...began to feel so attached to her
from a boy,who was short tempered....to a cold blooded guy....


but,u know.......
it feels so calm inside...like as in we feel..when we sit in church,mosque or temple/////

so.....as yesterday..she didn't came online...as her servr was dead...

so just wished him a gn text on her cell

nd then in gm wish text......

i don know....i just can't resist talkin to her.....

u know....
jab main ,doosre doston ko dekhta tha
to sochta tha..ki kaminey.....8-9 ghante cell pe kaise baat kar lete hain...

ab sochta hoon........kya sai  kismat hai saalon ki....

as....i'm just a another talkin medium for her

she..don't even know...how broken i'm

well.....its ok.....no one can compensate,for what i hav done...

so.....today..was a good day.....

i injured my hand......while......moving som good wighted granite pieces...

watched..that.....I MISS U.....sms f her....several times...

my headache..again got bigger.........cuz f those machines...


nd..that's it....

jjust missed her...like evry other day..nd that's nothin matter for her...:(

just feel disheartened.........some moments....

k...bye all...adios..ciao

hey

              P.S.  I LOVE U.....:)

Tere aa jaane se

u know..people..

yesterday .....
another time......i slept in same smiling posture......but..i slept waitin for an sms.......early at only 4:00am


it happened as...
when mehak nd i.....were just talkin .....her server tend to dc.......so
she said me to don't wait for her....via text on my phone

i think...she had some work..related to college..so said me that..

she'll text me...when finished....

so..i just kept waitin till 4:00 nd then...i don't know..when she came in my dreams......

Pal mein hi mujh ko mila pal naya

but...i was so happy........yesterday nd today.......as it matters so much to me.. 


so..today ..i wished her..good morning....though i was awaken from 7am....
but wished her at around 10....





but.....i like her while sleepin....though ,i have never seen ..in real...but i have my beliefs..:)<3
 nd moreover i didn't want to get my heart disturbed....:)


so....today..was a hectic day....

there were 2 facing machines ..cutting that hard granite stones.....nd made ,so much f noise..


that..i am having a severe headache......7 hrs f tough machinery nd sound....


so..it was worthless to bath in day time.....as it was smoke nd dust surroundin me


so..i took bath at 8:00pm


fir.thoda doston k ghoom aya.....as i needed fresh air..after this 8 hrs f so much hard noise nd pollution...:-/


ab thoda ..kam hai headache.....nd as always..missin mehak.......


nothin else ..to tell.....


i fed to new baby puppies .....that r new born nd came to me...while i was managin construction work...outside house....


they were quite hungary nd sweet...


i had a finger shake....wih them.......as..handshake can't b done.......




but..it was a nice experience....


u know...these animals watch me from eyes...as if they r requestin me for somthing....


nd i never ignore there feelings.......as there wishes do work too...:)




k...so i gotta go...as my headache is severe...nd due to so much smoke.....i'm not feeling ok


hey...

              P.S. I LOVE U....:)<3

straight through my heart

:)

sorry....i was too busy yesterday nd my condition was pretty week....nd my mom's too

cuz f the smoke...that's generated from construction work..

it was a minor headache.....

so....yesterday..

when after that drunk session ,i met with my gang

they all just pranked on me....

its just a freaky fun .....all around me...on me

but...we quite had a enjoyable moments together...as only twice a yr...we meet...


they just told me,what nd how ,i was behavin on after drinkin....

they asked me....that ....have i proposed to mehak or not

nd....then....i just ...remained quite nd they automatically understood ,what was her answer on this

but...as day before yesterday......she didn't came online.

so i just slept on my chair..nd felt down twice waitin for her

i have to change this chair now..:-/


but...yesterday.....she came onlINE

no..u'r guessing wrong

she came to see availability nd bookin f rail tickets online.....not for me..<3

so...i was just feelin solitudal

but.....i just did not pinged her....i felt as ,what she'll feel nd think..that..how awkward i am ,to do so..

as,it does not matter to her...but only me

i tried several times..to let go..nd to don't ping her

but.....this body..just is can't resist to talk to my heart...:-/

she seemed to b quite nd solitudal like at that moment...

so ,i asked her...why is she so...low

so..then..she told me..that...its her father's birthday....nd she's just feeling numb nd empty as....she has no one to share with ...

nd i know...girls have special attachment to the fathers

it felt like..real bad inside me...

noor-e-khuda..
yun na hamse nazren chupa


but..i literally can not do any thing for her...at that moment

so...just tried to make her..express nd wish nd talk to her father...for 2 small min.

so..i nd her....made a 2 min. wish moments..for her dad

i wished..just like every time.....with my whole heart

i wished..that ,may god lends her alll the sweetest things ,she want
all the things,she has crush to
may god...gave her a person.who just love like her dad,to her

just tried to tell uncle..how badly she misses him.....
nd just requested him to seek nd preserve her,with all the vitals that she need

karoon kya bhala
tumhi ko to main chahta hoon


uncle,se sorry bola
agar maine mehak ko,kisi baat pe hurt kiya ho to mujhe plz maaf karden

god se bola..ki usse itni himmat den,ki wo is kambhakht duniya se bina dare ....apne sapney jiye

may god.....just ..ease all her ways from which she will go through


nd u know..
it felt ...like really streamlined flow ,in my body
felt relaxed,happy ..

main to itna kho chuka tha wish karne main..ki jab mehak ne ping kiya..tabhi i woke up..from my wishes land

usne kuch khaya bhi nai tha......so usse thodi request ki,taki wo hungary na so jaye...

i just wanted to say to her ,at that moment ki

mehak..how hard it takes..but main hamesha tumhare saath rahoonga....

but i know..she'll never understand this....

u know.....she's THE stolid nd brave person ..i have seen..less in my life...

well,thn wo offline ho gai..lekin it was not a consciousness from her side

wo apne aap hi log out ,ho gai thi ,by mistake..

lekin ,i thought ,ki ....wo offline ho chuki hai

so...i also got offline..

fir ..main jaise hi uska gaana "hum rahen"...sunne ja raha tha ki..

ek unknown no. se sms aya.

as always..i thought..ki fir koi apne naya no. leke.....pareshaan karne wala hai

lekin..she was MEHAK...oh man....

u don't know,ho happy i was...

i just ..went fainted for some moments...stairing on my phone..at her no.

i couldn't believe ki..she texted me

nd..then..i wished her a safe night nd sleep...

and ,fir 5:40 tak...usi smile position main ..bed pe pada raha...

fir..pata ni kab neend ayi......lekin mummy ne fi se utha diya 7 baje

i was like.....first checked her no. in my phone..as if it was all like a dream...!!

then..got relaxed ..after seeing her sms....

huhh....

aaj adhe din ,to main inbox main jaake,uska sms hi padta raha,,baar baar..

aaj ka din bhy ....bahaut busy tha.....
isi liye...apne friends k paas bhi nai ja paya...

as mummy ,fir akeli rah jaati ghar pe...nd unki tabiyat bhi kharab hai thodi

aaj to ultimate wali labou giri kar daali maine..

neeche ka saara saman upar le gaya....nd it was like 60 times ...i stepped up/down from stairs ,with that all stuff

fir..wahan monkey bhi a gaye...

main to hardly...1 inch se bacha tha...nai to wo mere ko kaat leta...:(

acha hua...thoda sa bach gaya...

thanks monkey...:)

baki sab..theek raha...
poore din,sochta raha..ki kuch baaten karoon usse...via textin as callin karke to wo disturb ho jaayegi

but..didn't hav that guts to just send her sms...:(

nd now..my legs r just painin....
my upper side hand is also havin little pain..

but..its ok

atleast i worked good...:)


that's just all for now.....

hey..

P.S....I LOVE U...:)

IT WAS YOU

{

It was you
That showed me who I am
And taught me how to stand
For what I know is real

I was sick of all the pain
Tired of all the shame that I felt
But you showed me a way
To never have a doubt
And always to believe in myself

So how can I make this up to you
I'll fight and I'll push and I'll strive
Now that I'm living my life for you
I'll fight and I'll push and I'll strive
Can't you see...?

It was you
That showed me who I am
And taught me how to stand
For what I know is real

Now I'm breathin for the first time
And I'm leavin, all this behind
I've become, what I am because of you }


DEDICATED TO MY HEART ND LOVE....

yesterday......when i again pinged her....cuz i can't resist

she asked me...
as...how am i?

but....the question was so solitudal,that i just said   "i'm awesome"

nd bwe..i don't know..what she thought about this sentence f mine....


nd she talked to me....

she asked me...as if.....i'm like a friend or just those old feelings r flowing around me

nd i had nothin too answer about...i mean how can i!!

u know.....
she said ki,its not possible for her
she will b good with his arrange married husband

nd i thought

one day,she'll just wake up ,in morning

find her big ,fatty ,husband snorring(kharrate lete hue) ,coughing…
nd think that,what if atleast I have tried once..
what if everything…have been just fine
what if ,that love was meant to be with me
what if,my life today,had different meaning towards love

she told me..that..
she 's  not the miss. perfect for me...

but..mehak
i don't want any perfection ...as perfectness make u'r life least anxious nd more solitudal

i just want to b ,a noob...:)


{

If you reach deep inside you'll see my heart is true

Cuz I hate the way…I feel tonight
And I know I need you in my life
Yes I hate the way I feel inside
And I promise to make the sacrifice         }


u know....

i don't know ..why i write so much about her.....when she just refused me at first go...:-/
i don know..why i sit from 9:00pm nd wait for her so anxiously....
i don know...why she is so sweet....!!
don know....why she comes in my dreams...
don know...why she talks to me....whole day...

don know..why i just roam around searchin for her,like a bot


yesterday,she talked me about...her religion,foods,nd much more....

she was just countin our factors nd unlikeness...
i guess,she was doin analysis on me

but...maine to itna kabhi socha hi nai,actually mere to kabhi ye sab dimaag main nai aya..

i guess...tabhi main love kar baitha......kambhakht love..:(

i just feel u,inside me completely shadowed ....

yesterday....i got a dream about her

in which...she calls me ,in a cafe.....

i just waited for her for more then couple f hours

nd then she appears with his BF

nd seeyin this...i just smile...as i can't do nothin about this...:-/

next thing she says to me..is...

hey rahul...how r u feeling today!!!


nd i say......

".just like...when a man's dream come true.....:)"
nd i smile..nd leave

the waitor take a short laughin session with others.....

nd i just laugh at my self......bloody idiotic me.....

nd then....mob. alarm pops out.....
nd i wake up nd just think..about u
nd then..i say,i wish ,today ,i can forget her
nd then.....all my day,goes imagining...:-/


nd here is my fav. lines.on what i'm passin through

{TUMHE DEKHA,TUMHE CHAHA

TUMKO POOJA,DEKHA SUNA KUCH BHI NAI

ANSUON SE DOOBA KAAGAZ LIA,
USPE LIKHA KUCH BHI NAI,
RAAT BHAR JAAGA KIYA,

TUMSE KAHA ,KUCH BHI NAHI.....}...:(

ane the worse ,she suggested  me was....

i should burn..her photos...

i mean....why should i burn my love's pic.?

i don't understand....either way....

cuz.....thaat pic. will b like....so much precious to me.....
i can't even think f ..folding it.....burnin is like......impossible

k...so today's schedule was nothin like routine...

subah...at 7:00..i had to go to my tayi's house.....for some work
fir....papa k saath,thoda kaam karaya
fir ,labours k saath laga raha
fir...mere dost a gaye....as i havn't talked to them ..since last week

so they.were worried....

but i didn't share ny thing
as if this leaks out..

i will have tough ,time in college

as....u see..there r most friends who r close friends at u'r face but rival on back...:(

nd agar mehak hoti ,tabhi to unhe main batata kuch

wo to bas......my only one hai

ab main unhe ye bol doonga..

ki mera last love......24 hrs se bhi kam chala...

to ,that will make my wound more deeper..

as every time..if i'll try to just forget her

log...mujhe yaad dila hi denge...:(

mera ek pakka dost kal, a raha hai,pune se

so..kal shayad usse share kar loonga....apna last love


fir.......jab dost chale gaye....

main kal ki tarah.....fir bhatakti aatma ban k road pe nikal gaya

ki shayad....use thoda to bhool hi jaoonga

but...this isn't going...


u know..
i just keep quiet whole day.....
i don't know why..

koi khushi,koi gum.....mahsoos hi nai ho raha........:(

aaj ,fir se apna model start karte hue...
doosri ungli kaat li
fir uspe bandage chadaya........

now..my two most important fingures...r injured..but ..not in great sense...
it usually happens....as the propeller has blades..that r too sharp

nd ,we have to start ,model 's engine..by jerking the propeller quickly.
nd that....injures most f us...

just now..i'm waitin for her..to b online.....

even ,if she does not....talk to me
i would b happy ,to see her yellow blink..:)


hey....

        

                                                                               P.S  I LOVE YOU...:)

ONE LOVE......

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS


ITS LIKE FIRE ON MY FEET FLOOR....


FEELING SO RELAXED ND CALM AFTER SAYING ,ALL I WANNED TO 


TO MY FIRST LOVE..........:)

u know...she asked me ki,in this big life, 1 love can not b enough


but..for me...it will be.....


what IF


WE DON'T SUCCEED IN OUR 1ST LOVE
CUZ WE LACKED IN CERTAIN QUALiTIES.....I GUESS


BUT


AFTER ACHIEVING THOSE QUAliTIES...


WE NEVER LOVE AGAIN REALLY!!


                                                    STRANGE BUT TRUE.....:)

bwe.....
so...it happened like this...:o

i had my dinner..

nd was tellin him about my whole problem that i was facin frm couple f days

i guess,she figured out ,what prob. i had
nd told me that..i m in love


as most f my friends did

so...just asked me to share with her

but she was askin for the name f the girl ....i love

so..how can i tell her ,that she's the only one  ...!!:(

so...i decided to take help with my friends

texted them.......

nd then..came a flood f mess. in which..from 220 only 10-20 sms were nice:x:(

nd she also kinda motivated me to propose her

so...i just closed my eyes nd ...

said ...I LOVE U..... to her

nd that's it


i was so tensed that......i just closed my whole sys. after that...

duuh...nd i'm so much f idiotic that...forgotten to listen her answer...

darn......i don't have guts now..to talk to her

better ..i leave all this nd just listen to songs laying on my bed

but one thing that i felt after that..is a kinda relief..:)

man...that was lame

nd i guess....the lamest proposal ever done on this planet:-/:(

but...i was so much disturbed..that my whole mind got situated in delhi

so nothin left with me:(

k.....am done....
but now..m anxious about her answer..

GOD.......mercy...:)

good night...all
have a sweet nd nice dream...

i guess...i'll jut can't sleep today.....
like yesterday...:-/

50 First dates....

just watched a movie called "50 first dates"

its about a guy who loved so much with a girl ...but the girl had a short term memoryloss disorder due to which she seems to forget every thing..she has done one day before

i mean.....if this happens in real..this will really b hard on that guy who's in love...:(:-/

why do these romantic movies touch my heart all the time..:-/

well other than that....

i got my new makeover done...by myself....:D

nd my sis. says that i'm lookin really good in this..
 
i guess,i also  think so......


wish..i had one gf that can also suggest me some thing....:-/


nd.today's day,mehak is returnin from tour..so just anxious to talk to her...:)


well...that's all the story f the day..


avida for now....have a awesome day ahead people;)

today....
it was just an another day..
just got my bike's insurance,phone credited, nd autocad certificate from a institute from which i opted for autocad learning...

what else...just missin i don know what...but sum thing..:-/

i guess....its like missin my college,friends,nd huhh....i don know......

missin talkin to her....can't ell name as she has warned me for that....but still waitin for her to come online

but i feel like empty nd clumzy inside as this virtual world is fake sumtimes....

nd i don want to happen that with me...

its just me wantin a realism ....:-@

u know..u can't go with u'r pc nd net connection every where ,even if u want to...

nd that makes me so dumb......:(

as even if i want to talk to this angel...i can't ,except for at sum social networkin site nd yahoo

nd that's so bad

i mean..i asked her...for if she can share her no.

but i guess.....this false world don't allow her to do that

nd its more f her distrust on me.....:-/

i don know...why but,.....its strange

i'hv been sharin with her...all my talks...but still she think that i can b a "bad man"

lol...but i'm not that kinda person

i will never call or visit som one..untill i get confirmation of that person ....

cuz...i feel that incorrect

i'll never ask nyone why he/she's late..as they can have their own problems ...

but its ok..

u know.i gave a song to mehak yesterday,while we were talkin in generally

nd she got offline when full song ws uploaded to her system,

i don know why,but that song is realy nice..nd has nothin bad in it.....

its just a soft romantic song..she asked me for....

btw...she's on her tour now........nd i'm here...waitin for her........hehehehe

nd yea...today the sun was good in atmosphere.....nd itz some less colder then yesterday

i'm thinkin of again,joinin the gym..as i left cuz of my semester exams:)

nd i'm bit anxiuos about doing that stuff again.....:D

RELAXED:)

u know guys

the apologize i'hv done yesterday ...

i guess ,she has forgiven me for that blog:)

so....today i watched movie called VEER..nd review f this movie is

ONLY A VEER CAN WATCH VEER:p

as the movie was bundle nd fired up  ,all around

i guess all directors can not b like aamir khan:D:P:-/

nd my family is back home,so todays lunch was so homely nd good

what else to say....!!

my college r closed now,holidays r going on,weather is so cold....that i can't hang around with my friends in so much cold

my health is ok now....

oh...nd see
the sun is shining again parting all the cvlouds nd mists away:)

i guess,i'll go to roof top,nd heat myself nd then bath ....oh..thank god

i havn't seen,no sun from over a week

nd i don know,how she's washin her clothes in so much cold weather in capital...:o:(

some lines i'm rememberin in fondness f someone


Somehow I found a way to get lost in you
Let me inside
Let me get close to you
Change your mind
I'll get lost if you want me to
Somehow I found a way to get lost in you

huhh......k...going for some vitamin -d ....:P

keep enjoyin life....ciao for now

deus vobiscum

I'M AFRAID ND TENSED

u know...i wrote a blog about my conversation with mahak

i sent most f my friends ,the request to follow my blog..

nd i guess if she had noticed nd read my blog about her

so...i'm bit tensed that what will she feel if ,she finds som thing wrong in my story..

as i don't hav ,no words ,if she asks me for an explanation.

SORRY MEHAK..IF ANYTHING APPEARED WRONG TO U:(

but as said,we can not erase the past ,just try to correct the mistakes in present....:-/

i guess..i shoudn't hav sent her the request......darn't....i'm so foolish

i sent a request f blog .in which i'm writin som thing about her....

yesterday when she was talkin to me on yahoo messenger

she said me to dine while she was checkin the mails...

nd then she never replied yesterday ...as my mail was also their ,nd i guess she read all my blog..:'(

i'm so much f idiot....:x

all the time ,this foolish things happen out to me,i don know why but

i surely don't know,how to talk with the girls

otherwise i would also had atleast one gf..that would have loved me from her heart..:)

duhhh....all these dreams r so illusion makin inside me....:-/:x

some thing sweet:)

ok....yesterday,i was just sitting on innernet as my family is not at home.
and i'm all alone for a past 1 week

but just when i was about to close that too cuz f boredom

a girl pinged me,at first i didn't figure out who she ws....cuz f her id name..

but then..she told me...MEHAK

nd i was so surprised,as i never thought ki she will talk to me here..as if u people  followin my blog

i hav mentioned her couple f times

but,yesterday was different
i got to know more f her,u know like as in personally

previously i thought she was a kinda girl who is introvert nd very sensitive

but..yesterday she mentioned me about her crush,nd his x gf who he's talkin all over with mehak,while she is in crush with that guy
the guy seems to see his x gf in mehak

i found that strange.....nd just gave her sum suggestions,about this whole stuff

as u know,u can't love a person who finds someone else in u,and want u to change for him/her partially/completely

so...i guess ,she listened to me but its upto her to forward her relationship with him.....or just start with a new day:)

the second thing  she told me was,  her father is not on planet now.....

i felt so much like hugging her nd give a jaadu ki jhhapi

but,this virtual world doesn't give us permission to do that

she told me about some of her personal life.....nd listening to her....i was so much touched. that
whole day ,today,i kept talkin about her to my friends

deus vobiscum

we talked about the orthodoxic people,the catastrophic development f our country towards women

but,i was so happy,as some one whose thinkin was pretty much matched with mine...:)

i showed her my crush's pic,that was about 5 years back:P

nd at that instant my milk,that i hav put on burner was burned whole down...with only bubbles left

nd she's so talented that she helped me with the cleaning f scale that was on the whole utensil

SO NICE F HER YAAR:)

ahem ahem....ok

then when she was leavin..she told me that her eyes is blue.....

nd from that moment i'm trying to imagine that how she looks with her blue eyes
as i havn't seen any buddy in my life with blue eyes in india...!!

from that moment i'm just thinkin about those conversations happened....plz god...
this time don't get me addicted to anyone..as all the time i addict myself to them,nd hurt my little hurt

its like making TOXIC VALENTINE ,
as i never had that courage to tell a girl how i feel about her

that reminds me f a song

i see u walkin through the door,
i got to tell u how i feel
oh baby u'r the only one for me:)




tumhe kaise main bataoon,
kya main pa gaya hoon
tum jo mere saath ho
mujhko duniya mil gai hai,
jindagii badal gai hai,tum jo mere paas ho:)


how sweet f me :D

par this time i'll try my bast not to develop my feelings for her..:-/
as she has unlimited list f her crushes...nd i will stand no where ,to her expectations

huhh......blue eyes kaisi lagti hongi yaar,i am still imagining her...........:x:(

///beta rahul....band karo ye sab sochna......///

duhh.....after sems:o

so...now...as the sems r over,nd i m feeling relaxed




just observed that.the love that ,i was talkin about in my previous post with girl(mehak)


was only a flute....as its now 2 months we have talked


i mean..if there was ny thing,then we must have been in contact but...i guess..that was only a fluctuation f mind...:)


nd i'm quiet good,after been out f that....single minded again..no tensions:D


nd..about the life...


its too cold in my city today,so just brought my blower in my room:P


i still being with all my friends miss someone special nd pretty.....to talk to nd share my life..but its ok..


as singleship is good,,as i havn't experienced ny relationship yet.....

APNI NAZAR K SAAMNE JAB AYEGI

ZINDAGI KABHI TO JAGMAGAYEGI    :D:)